bx7's Interesting Bible Verse Thread

bx7 · #1 10-05-2006, 05:20 AM

While I gladly wield the sword of the Lord to present truths in other threads, I want to make a unique one to post up interesting verses I find through my daily reading. Your Basic Information Before Leaving Earth manual is full of them

Last night I came across this one which I found pretty funny:

Isaiah 5:22 (NIV)
Woe to those who are heroes at drinking wine and champions at mixing drinks,

To be sure, this is a serious warning, but the wording makes me laugh. In my youth, my friends and I would gather to be heroes at drinking beer. Thankfully those days are over. I still enjoy an adult beverage from time to time but I have no desire to engage in some foolish 'power hour' as we used to call it, or to drink beers from a funnel. It may be an anatomical marvel that people can drink beer from a tap while being suspended upside down, this is really unnecessary.

czarofzar · #2 10-05-2006, 05:54 AM

Cold beer is a must, on hot days after work. Then drive home. or. drive home with a cold one hidden in your coffee mug. either way, avoid traffic. youll have to pee soon.

$100T2 · #3 10-05-2006, 09:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by yzf-r1

In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth....

3500 years later, still the most definitive and accurate statement about origins ever uttered

Here, I'll be more accurate right now.

In the beginning, something created the universe. We don't know what, but there's lots of theories.

There ya go, we can start a whole new religion.

bx7 · #4 10-06-2006, 05:25 AM

2 Corinthians 12:2 (NKJV)

I know a man in Christ who fourteen years ago--whether in the body I do not know, or whether out of the body I do not know, God knows--such a one was caught up to the third heaven.

Third Heaven? What in the Wide World of Sports is this?

czarofzar · #5 10-06-2006, 05:39 AM

Guess what they grow in afganistan? An extract from the sap of unripe poppy seedpods, used in medicine and narcotics. oh and weed too. "Do lines till you die! Yeah baby yeah! And write me another spiritual verse, Paul! YEAH! (here, smoke this first son)"

czarofzar · #6 10-06-2006, 11:11 PM

"I will not pity, nor spare, nor have mercy, but destroy." (Jer. 13:14) "Now go and smite Amalek, and utterly destroy all that they have, and spare them not, but slay both man and woman, infant and suckling."

"The Lord is very pitiful and of tender mercy." (James 5:11)
"For his mercy endureth forever." (1 Chron. 16:34)
"The Lord is good to all, and his tender mercies are over all his works." (Ps. 145:9)
"God is love." (1 John 4:16)

Your god is poison

$100T2 · #7 10-07-2006, 09:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by yzf-r1

God's love is ony one of His many prismatic characteristics....God is HOLY, HOLY, HOLY....God is PERFECT....God HATES sin and will not tolerate it

OK.

So God is perfect.

God created man.

God hates sin.

Man is inherently evil.

Therefore, perfect God created inherently evil, sinning man, whom, by your logic, he must hate.

But God loves us? If God were so perfect and hated sin, why not create man devoid of the ability to sin? Why the testing? Why make it difficult?

The more I listen to your stuff, the more I think Al Pacino was right in "Devil's Advocate":

Quote:

Originally Posted by Al Pacino

Guilt is like a bag of fucking bricks. All you gotta is set it down... Who are you carrying all those bricks for anyway? God? Is that it? God? Well I tell you. Let me give you a little inside information about God. God likes to watch. He's a prankster. Think about it. He gives man instincts. He gives you this extraordinary gift and then what does he do? I swear, for his own amusement, his own private cosmic gag reel he sets the rules in opposition. It's the goof of all time. Look but don't touch. Touch but don't taste. Taste but don't swallow. And while you're jumping on one foot to the next, what is he doing? He's laughing his sick fucking ass off. He's a tightass. He's a sadist. He's an absentee-landlord! Worship that? Never!

bx7 · #8 10-10-2006, 12:17 PM

Matthew 11:12

And from the days of John the Baptist until now the kingdom of heaven suffers violence, and the violent take it by force.

How does this fit with election?

mazdaspeedrex · #9 10-10-2006, 01:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by yzf

because without the test, faith would be meaningless and God would have a bunch of smug, self righteous people running around that took everything for granted...think about it

But if there was no sin, pride would not exist, and there would be no smugness or self righteousness.

czarofzar · #10 10-10-2006, 06:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bx7

Matthew 11:12

And from the days of John the Baptist until now the kingdom of heaven suffers violence, and the violent take it by force.

How does this fit with election?

heaven suffering violence? No worries. God is probably cleaning house in his own violent way.

bx7 · #11 10-11-2006, 05:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by czarofzar

heaven suffering violence? No worries. God is probably cleaning house in his own violent way.

Actually it's not really about heaven suffering violence. It's more about the people who will be saved, busting their way through the opening. An excellent discussion can be found here:

http://www.seedofabraham.net/kingdomv.html

bx7 · #12 10-16-2006, 08:54 AM

Matthew 25:24

Then he who had received the one talent came and said, 'Lord, I knew you to be a hard man, reaping where you have not sown, and gathering where you have not scattered seed

Who can reap where he didn't sow? This has always been a mystery to me. I was reading a Ravi Zacharias book last night and it mentioned something about the Israeli's coming into the promised land and it described them as "reaping where they didn't sow". They inherited the land and the produce from the ground. I wonder if the Zacharias reference sheds any light on how the Master in the parable went about reaping where he didn't sow.

honegod · #13 10-16-2006, 04:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by yzf-r1

Romans 5

...just as the result of one trespass was condemnation for all men, so also the result of one act of righteousness was justification that brings life for all men.

another poor translation to be rectified in a later revised edition ?

all men were condemned by the sin of adam, but NOT all men were saved from the second death by the blood sacrifice of christ.

http://www.seedofabraham.net/kingdomv.html
Unfortunately, when Matthew was translated into Greek 'there was something lost in the translation.'

so the ORIGINAL book of Matthew was NOT written in greek, yet the greek translations are now considered the original.

bx7 · #14 10-20-2006, 07:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by yzf-r1

wait a minute, why are you referencing a comment from a wicked and lazy servant who was cast into hell? does what he said have any merit? I think not...similarly, Job's friends said some things that simply were not right, and sometimes seemed to be demonically inspired

certainly God scatters the seed (His Word) or no one can ever grow

Even the Master agrees that he reaps where he doesn't sow. Does it have merit? Probably not, but you would agree that the discussion has value. What do you think it means? The servant could have ended his excuse by saying that he knew his master was a hard man. I don't think it changes the story in any case but it is an interesting point to add.