got these in my email:

Grandma and Grandpa were watching a healing service on
the television.


The evangelist called to all who wanted to be healed to
go to their television set, place one hand on the TV
and the other hand on the body part where they wanted
to be healed.


Grandma got up and slowly hobbled to the television set,
placed her right hand on the set and her left hand on her
arthritic shoulder that was causing her to have great
pain.


Then Grandpa got up, went to the TV, placed his right
hand on the set and his left hand on his crotch.


Grandma scowled at him and said, "I guess you just don't
get it. The purpose of doing this is to heal the sick,
not raise the dead."





A man goes into a restaurant, sits down at a table and
an attractive young waitress comes for his order. He
gives her a smile and says, "I want a quickie." She
turns red in the face and ahems, "Sir, I don't know
what kind of restaurant you're used to eating in, but
I can assure you you're not going to get a quickie here!"
"How disappointing," the man replied. "Could you ask the
chef to make an exception?"
"He doesn't have anything to do with it!" says the
waitress indignantly.
"Hmmm," do you know anywhere around here where I could
get a quickie?"
"I'm SURE I don't know," answers the waitress loudly.


A patron from the next table leans over and taps the man
on the shoulder,
"I think it's pronounced QUICHE."

hehe

HA HA HA........liked the first one better.:lmfao: :rofl:

That doesn't hit too close to home does it michael? :D j/k

Oh, I'm far from that thank u.