edit: PM sent

Dude, it sounds like your a human male. And a good one at that. Just this morning a co worker told me about this girl he parked next to and said "I'd divorce my wife for that!"

Thanks Rodney. That does make me feel better.


Any idea on how to make it go away? I know it's a long shot, but any advise would help.

well, this is a confusing thread, it is indeed.

PM sent honegod

Maybe if you tell your wife she'll give you some really good sex that will win you back? Or maybe she wont care at all...

I might end up dead, but who knows.



this was my thread so that someone doesn't get the wrong idea.

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I feel guilty

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(I can't believe I'm doing this, but here goes)
A few weeks ago, we got a new file clerk at work. Since day one, I have had a small attraction to her. It's nothing big, believe me, but there is something there.

I have not had any inappropriate thoughts of this girl. Not one. The worst thought I've had is having coffee with her and just talking. I don't think I ever will think of anything worse. ---not BSing

Contrary to what you might think, I don't want her as a partner. I don't even think about her when I'm not at work except for rare occassions like this when i feel I have to address this.

I don't like this. I don't want to think about any girl other than my wife even if it's "somewhat innocent."

Have you guys had something similar? What can I do to make this go away? Am I committing a sin?

I know I may sound like a fruit, but I want this unwanted "stress" to go away.

Any suggestions?

Please don't flame me, I come here for help. Also, please don't move this thread from this section.

There's absolutely nothing wrong with being attracted to other women. The fact that this attraction is not a sexual one is somewhat surprising though.

With respect to the guilt you are feeling, it is somewhat strange considering that you have done nothing wrong but sometimes we feel guilt for unusual reasons. I wouldn't tell your wife about it because it will likely seem like a bigger deal than it is. Just give it time and it will pass.

whoopee !!! my first PM {here} :D

first, you come from a christian dominated country where everybody is raised to believe that they are AUTOMATICALLY guilty from birth, guilt is the default condition of humanity.

it sounds like you have been convicted of that guilt and have accepted jesus' offer of forgiveness, so although your guilt is forgiven it is still there, it just doesn't count against your salvation.

american christianity is totally obsessivly perverted on the subject of sex, {as is islam, though they go in a somewhat different direction} so since sex is a thing fraught with massive potential for sin, and so guilt, any sniff of possible sex becomes a potential source of guilt.

you are feeling guilty of having introduced the possibility of sex with the person BECAUSE SHE IS FEMALE and so a potential sex partner.

a male in that exact position would cause no guilt because of the impossibility of sex.

so, your wife should be able to give you absolution by explaining that she trusts you to NOT sin with this person and you can treat her as though she was a human being instead a bit of walking sin.

which WON'T help with the guilt, this time.

but if y'all can keep this sort of thing up and you treat more and more of the women you have contact with as humans your guilt should diminish proportionatly.

assuming you don't flip and boff the wench.

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I feel guilty

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Well since Mark's been banned, (and I'd say it was a rather shallow sanction considering everyone expects a good bashing in the religion section), I suppose I'll add the scriptural perspective.

Be careful. Your conscience is convicting you of the truth, and that's a good thing. Jesus speaks about this in Matthew 5:

27 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit adultery.’* 28 But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

Ark is correct. Unless you like more stress, don't tell the wife. Good to know you are not gay. Everything working properly as they should.

You are going to run into a lot of these women whom you will fall attracted to in some way. Find a way to stay busy.

Thanks guys. I knew I would find guidance here.

I'm not telling the wife. It's something that will pass and I don't want any trouble.

As for keeping busy, "I'm driving on a windy mountain road by the beach in a Porsche GT3 with my wife as a passenger." That thought and work should keep me busy for weeks.

UPDATE.

I feel a lot better today.

I haven't even wanted to see my co-wroker at all today. I feel back to normal like before she got here. All I can think about is going out to eat with the awesome wife tonight.

I guess all I needed was to share my ridiculous problem with you guys.
Devine intervention???

I love you guys. :)


*puts anti-flame suit on*

It happens to all men, don't worry. Just don't act on it, and you'll be just fine. Try not to see too much of her, either, that will help.

When you get those thoughts, look at your beautiful wife, daughter and home, those thoughts should get you out of any slump ever.

that's totally normal...

you can't control how you feel. but you can control how you act. so the proper thing to do is not act on your attraction. it's great you recognized that.

http://img404.imageshack.us/img404/8102/hititintheforest7yo.jpg

:roll:

it wasn't like that at all.