2ndGen.Rocket
06-14-2007, 11:42 PM
So I had a softball game at 9:30 tonight. I made the good decision to dive for a grounder, and in the process tore both my knees to shreds. I drive home with my legs covered in blood and in all sorts of pain, hop in the shower, and then bandage myself up. I'm sitting on the couch in pain, and still all hyped up at 11pm because I've been running all over the place. So I say to myself, "hey, why not go grab a bottle of wine, have a couple glasses to calm down and then go to sleep?" Sounded like a great idea.
Since there aren't any liquor stores open at this hour, I drive to my local Wal-Mart. Grabbed a bottle of Shiraz, and walk to the express lane. I am clearly in line, with a single item, and there is some douchebag to my left, with his cart full of 37 different kinds of lightbulbs angled in towards the register. Since I am fairly courteous myself, I really don't think anything of it, never crossed my mind that this guy would go for it. Needless to say, the guy does go for it, shoves his cart in front of me and starts slowly piling lightbulbs on the counter. My initial reaction was to say "What the fuck!". Dude looks at me and says "I was here first".
In disbelief, I don't really know what to say for the first 5 seconds. I look at the cashier who is looking at me with a look that says "He was here first, sorry". I now start running my mouth to this douchebag, asking him if he wants to run back to aisle 10 where he dropped his manners, asking him why he is changing 30 something lightbulbs at 11 on a Thursday, asking if his wife is making him do it, then asking if he even has a wife or if he is gay, basically I am real pissed right now, and my effing legs are in pain.
The douchebag now turns to me and tells me to "watch my mouth". I laugh, tell him that he is a douchebag, and that he isn't going to do anything. At this point there are 4 other people in line behind me, all equally pissed at douchebag, and all laughing at the fact that I am heckling him.
Next thing I know, out of absolutely nowhere, a security guard walks up and asks me to leave. I am in shock, ask the guy if he saw what douchebag did, and explain that I just want this one damn bottle of wine. He tells me "I think you might have had enough", and grabs my arm to walk me out. Mind you I haven't drank anything at all, my legs hurt, this guy is a douchebag, and I'm getting escorted out of Wal-Mart.
If anyone can beat that, please do. I can't believe a Wal-Mart security guard just booted me for "being obnoxious". Now I'm sitting here even more amped up, my legs still hurt, and I'm drinking water. Kick ass.
Since there aren't any liquor stores open at this hour, I drive to my local Wal-Mart. Grabbed a bottle of Shiraz, and walk to the express lane. I am clearly in line, with a single item, and there is some douchebag to my left, with his cart full of 37 different kinds of lightbulbs angled in towards the register. Since I am fairly courteous myself, I really don't think anything of it, never crossed my mind that this guy would go for it. Needless to say, the guy does go for it, shoves his cart in front of me and starts slowly piling lightbulbs on the counter. My initial reaction was to say "What the fuck!". Dude looks at me and says "I was here first".
In disbelief, I don't really know what to say for the first 5 seconds. I look at the cashier who is looking at me with a look that says "He was here first, sorry". I now start running my mouth to this douchebag, asking him if he wants to run back to aisle 10 where he dropped his manners, asking him why he is changing 30 something lightbulbs at 11 on a Thursday, asking if his wife is making him do it, then asking if he even has a wife or if he is gay, basically I am real pissed right now, and my effing legs are in pain.
The douchebag now turns to me and tells me to "watch my mouth". I laugh, tell him that he is a douchebag, and that he isn't going to do anything. At this point there are 4 other people in line behind me, all equally pissed at douchebag, and all laughing at the fact that I am heckling him.
Next thing I know, out of absolutely nowhere, a security guard walks up and asks me to leave. I am in shock, ask the guy if he saw what douchebag did, and explain that I just want this one damn bottle of wine. He tells me "I think you might have had enough", and grabs my arm to walk me out. Mind you I haven't drank anything at all, my legs hurt, this guy is a douchebag, and I'm getting escorted out of Wal-Mart.
If anyone can beat that, please do. I can't believe a Wal-Mart security guard just booted me for "being obnoxious". Now I'm sitting here even more amped up, my legs still hurt, and I'm drinking water. Kick ass.